Roast Mortem Cast

Dead men tell no tales. So we do it for them.

About the show

We've all been taught to venerate the dead. Where's the fun in that?! No one can take all their rotten secrets to the grave. Humans are just trash monsters that make mistakes, rub together and make more humans. So, let's grab some beers, bury inhibitions and dig up some dirt on history's most iconic departed.

Roast Mortem Cast on social media

Episodes

  • 243 - Sir Richard Burton (pt.4): An Examination of the Gash.

    July 28th, 2022  |  1 hr 34 mins
    19th century, africa, comedy, crimean war, drinking, england, ethiopia, exploration, history, kenya, podcast, river, sociology, somalia, the nile

    Burton sets out for an expedition of the unexplored city of Harar in modern day Ethiopia, he documents extreme female circumcision, fights in the Crimean War and had a decisive scuffle with the Somali's and his stalker back in London.

    The quest for the source of the Nile has begun!

  • 242 - Sir Richard Burton (pt.3): Undercover Hajj to Mecca

    July 21st, 2022  |  1 hr 56 mins
    19th century, britain, comedy, cultural studies., desert, drinking, exploration, history, islam, mecca, podcast, undercover

    Richard Burton meets his stalker fan girl then sets off on a exploration of Islam's most venerated cities, Medina & Mecca, disguised as Mizra Abdullah.

  • 241- Sir Richard Burton (pt.2): A Soldier's* Life

    July 14th, 2022  |  1 hr 26 mins
    afghanistan, anthropology, british army, british empire, comedy, england, history, imperialism, india, language, linguistics, monkey, pakistan, podcast, sex, sex studies, war

    *Not actively deployed to combat. Just spent his time documenting breasts, exposing homosexual activity, drinking weed, living amongst monkeys; calling one of them his wife. In fact, there is very little soldiering happening in this episode... It mainly consists of imperialistic debauchery in India and the raving of a madman.

  • 240 - Sir Richard Burton (pt.1): Yung Ruffian Dick

    July 7th, 2022  |  1 hr 16 mins
    adventure, childhood, comedy, drinking, english history, explorer, hell raiser, history, podcast

    We begin a journey into one of the most eccentric adventures of all time, Sir Richard Burton. Looking into his life as a child hellraiser

  • 239 - Humphrey Bogart: The Stiffest Drink and the Blackest Lungs

    June 30th, 2022  |  1 hr 30 mins
    1940s, acting, actors, cinema, comedy, drinking, film, film history, film noire, golden age of hollywood, history, hollywood, movies, podcast

    We exam the life and times of one of Hollywood's most legendary actors, Humphrey Bogart. From his dysfunctional marriage to Mayo Meth-Thot, his constant drinking and smoking, this spoiled rich kid, never really fit in until it was too late.

  • 238 - Carl Sagan: The Language of the Cosmos are Boners

    June 23rd, 2022  |  2 hrs 6 mins
    america history, carl sagan, comedy, cosmo, drinking, history, podcast, science, space, universe

    Grant from Thought Cops joins us for astronomer, exobiologist and dank boy Carl Sagan. Sagan was a man that taught millions about the wonders of the universe, but he also kept some very horny scientist friends. We explore the amazing career of this 20th century scientist, from the US space race, to Dolphin boners.

  • 237 - Alexander the Great (pt6): All GREAT things come to an end

    June 16th, 2022  |  1 hr 34 mins
    alexander the great, ancient greece, ancient history, classical, comedy, drinking, greek history, history, influential people, military, podcast, warfare

    All great things come to an end, we unpack the mysterious and sudden death of Alexander the Great, his legacy and all the chafed thighs he affected!

  • 236 - Alexander the Great (pt5): Hitting the Hindu Kush

    June 9th, 2022  |  1 hr 43 mins
    alexander the great, ancient greece, ancient history, antiquity, battle tactics, comedy, empire, epic, history, india, iran, legend, military history, pakistan, persian, podcast, warfare

    Alex expands further and further into Asia. Into a world previously unknown to the Hellenic states. Where people eat spicy curry, ride giant ants and smoke the dankest nugs!

  • 235 - Alexander the Great (pt4): Empire Building 101

    June 2nd, 2022  |  1 hr 41 mins
    alexander the great, ancient greece, ancient history, antiquity, battle tactics, comedy, empire, epic, history, legend, military history, persian, podcast, warfare

    Alexander continues to steamroll around the the Mediterranean. He mashes the Gordian Knot, he poops his pants with malaria, he creates a freaking peninsula to attack the island city of Tyre!!! Oh and if you thought Zeus and Philip were his only daddies.... Try Amon-Ra. Cause guess what, he takes Egypt. All leading up to the decisive battle against the flaccid Darius at the Battle of Gaugamela!

  • 234 - Alexander the Great (pt3): Epic Darius vs Alexander Showdown

    May 26th, 2022  |  1 hr 32 mins

    Alexander first faces off with Darius III and instantly finds his gaping hole

  • 233 - Alexander the Great (pt2): Hard Hellenic Hell-Raising

    May 19th, 2022  |  1 hr 16 mins
    alexander the great, ancient history, classical, comedy, drinking, greece, greek history, history, macedonia, persia, podcast, politics, warfare

    Our saga of Alexander the Great continues... or begins, as Alexander is pooped out into the world, electrified by the jizzbolts of the mighty Zeus!
    But lil' Alex isn't great just yet, he is just a baby boy! His daddy Philp on the other hand is smacking around all of his other Hellenic neighbors, even scores himself a druggie Oracle. DOPE!
    But when you fly too close to Helios, you're gonna get burned.

  • 232 - Alexander the Great (pt1): Greek Salad Extra Ranch

    May 12th, 2022  |  1 hr 39 mins
    ancient history, classical, comedy, drinking, greek history, history, podcast

    We begin are hard as hell epic of Alexander the Great. Not even making it out of the womb, we cover the hell out of ancient ionic Greek and their slick thighs

  • 231 - Chiang Kai-shek (pt4): Taiwan!!! second times a charm, right?

    May 5th, 2022  |  1 hr 35 mins
    china, chinese history, cia, cold war, comedy, dictator, drinking, espionage, history, podcast, revolution, taiwan, us foreign politics, warfare

    The final episode of our Chiang Kai-shek series. The ultimate showdown between Mao Zedong and Chiang Kai-Shek... Spoilers Chaing losses... From his tiny island of Taiwan, he declares that he will one day retake mainland China!

  • 230 - Chiang Kai-Shek (pt3): WWII Gangbang

    April 28th, 2022  |  1 hr 31 mins
    1930s, 1940s, america, china, chinese history, combat, comedy, communism, history, international diplomacy, japan, military history, podcast, war, war crimes, warfare, wwii

    We cover the Second Sino-Japanese War and WWII as Chiang goes to war with modern mechanized Imperial Japan as he burns his own country to the ground. And after some sailors in Hawaii have a really bad day Dec 7th 1941, America joins the fight!

  • 229 - Chiang Kai-Shek (pt2): The Sloppy Nanjing Decade & Donald of China

    April 21st, 2022  |  1 hr 31 mins
    1920s, 1930s, asian history, china, chinese, chinese history, comedy, communism, history, japan, manchuria, military history, nanjing decade, podcast, revolution, war, warfare

    Our story of Chiang Kai Shek continues and we dive head first into the Nanjing Decade. Chiang seizes power and leads a violent purge of the CCP. And one extremely white dude named Donald of China, saves the country from unraveling at the seams.

  • 228 - Chiang Kai-Shek (pt1): The Virgin Boy Egg of China

    April 14th, 2022  |  2 hrs 5 mins
    china, chinese history, civil war, comedy, drinking, history, japan, military history, podcast, rebellion, revolution

    We begin a epic series down the life of revolutionary and founder of modern China, Chiang Kai-Shek. Chiang quickly shed his 'Milk name' and headed out into a career in the military, nationalism and syphilis