Roast Mortem Cast

86 - King Edward II (pt.1): Flesh Jousting with Piers Gaveston

July 3rd, 2019  |  1 hr 5 mins

14th century, comedy, dark ages, drinking, english history, gay, history, king, medieval, middle ages, monarchy, podcast, royal

King Edward II of England was not the epic monarch leading his troops into battle, like his Papa Edward Longshanks. He was more into noodling on his crwth, playing in the dirt and seeing how far he can deep throat a banana.

85 - Stede Bonnet: The Wussiest Pirate Ever

June 27th, 2019  |  1 hr 3 mins

18th century, booty, comedy, high seas, history, lame, looting, pirate, podcast, sea battles, ships, swashbuckling

You know Black Beard. You know Captain Kidd. But have you ever heard of Stede Bonnet?!? This dude ran away from his wife & kids and took his billions to become the weakest pirate ever. Even going so far to set up a pirate HR for his crew.

84 - The Collyer Brothers: NYC's Trash-Beast Hoarders

June 20th, 2019  |  1 hr 23 mins

These strange inbred Bronx brothers are two of history's most notorious hoarders. They packed 136 tons of trash into their brownstone apartment, blocking out all light to the outside world. We dive head first into the smelly mess that was the Collyer Brothers.

83 - Carry A. Nation: Hatchet-toting Grandma & Party Pooper Extraordinaire

June 13th, 2019  |  1 hr 21 mins

20th century, alcohol, bar culture, booze, christianity, comedy, crazy, crazy lady, destruction, drinking, eggs, extremist, hatchet, history, icp, podcast, prohibition, protest, temperance, violence, women's history, women's rights

This old bat just didn't want people to have fun! No drinking, no smoking, no gambling... And if you didn't follow her rules, she'd let you know about it!!!

82 - President James Buchanan: The Dough-Faced Southern Sympathizer that Broke America

June 6th, 2019  |  1 hr 20 mins

american civil war, american history, bachelor, blunder, civil war, comedy, confederates, congress, dough face, drinking, drunk, first lady, history, homosexual, james buchanan, lancaster, lgbtq, lincoln, party, pennsylvania, podcast, politician, politics, president, racism, scandal, senate, senator, slavery, south, the white house, union, us government, washington dc

Who do you think is the worst President? Well you're wrong! James Buchanan gave BJs to all the racist southern politicians and was hands down responsible the succession of the South. You know the Civil War... The time that Americans killed each other instead of blocked each other on Twitter.

81 - Ivan the Terrible: Was pretty damn terrible

May 30th, 2019  |  1 hr 35 mins

16th century, comedy, czar, history, impale, medieval, monarchy, murder, murderer, noble, podcast, prince, royal, russia, russian history, serial killer, torture

This Monster Energy drinking idiot loved to beat his head against the ground. And when he wasn't killing brain cells he was straight up torturing and murdering thousands of Russians.

80 - Sam Hughes: WWI's Canadian Cry-Baby

May 23rd, 2019  |  1 hr 54 mins

army, battlefield, canada, comedy, corruption, enlistment, generals, history, lacrosse, militaria, military, nationalism, passchendaele, patronage, podcast, politics, prime minister, reserves, rifle, tactics, the great war, the somme, toronto, trench warfare, war, warfare, wwi

What happens when you take a warmongering sociopath and put him in charge of the military right before the outbreak of WWI? Sam Hughes happens! The man responsible for countless Canadian deaths, child like hissy fits and shameless slander.

79 - Andy Warhol: Voyeuristic, Commercial Meme Lord

May 16th, 2019  |  2 hrs 3 mins

1960s, 1970s, albino, american art, american history, andy warhol, art house, art of sale, artist, asexual, attempted murder, avant garde, avant garde film, bisexual, comedy, commercialism, drinking, drugs, film, gay, greenwich, history, lgbtq, mass produced art, models, nyc, podcast, pop art, pretentious, self centered, silk screening, the factory, thief, vain, voyeurism, weeny boy

Did Andy Warhol singlehandedly destroy art or just invent the Meme? This frail little albino boy had a propensity for watching eccentrics slowly kill themselves at his Blade-style night club (- techno, vampires & cybergoths) The Factory.

78 - Valerie Solanas: The Feminist Eugenist that gunned down Andy Warhol

May 9th, 2019  |  1 hr 46 mins

1960's, 1968, andy warhol, art history, attempted murder, avant garde, crazy, criminal, drinking, feminism, gay movement, greenwich village, history, hobo, lgbtq, murder, now, nyc, patriarchy, philosophy, podcast, pop art, powerful women, scum manifesto, the factory, writer

Was the woman who gunned down Andy Warhol a radical feminist fighting the patriarchy or just a hobo Hitler that wanted to exterminate the inferior male gender? Find out as we roast the queen of bumming cigarettes and giving out quickies, Valerie Solanas.
Plus a extremely kid friendly lesson about the birds and the bees from Travis.

77 - Francisco Pizarro: Illiterate Pig-Farmer Conquistador

May 2nd, 2019  |  1 hr 26 mins

16th century, colonization, comedy, conquistador, discovery, drinking, explorer, genocide, gold, history, inca, llamas, murder, native, new world, peru, podcast, seafarer, sociology, spain, warfare

Remember the Incans? No? Probably cause this greedy illiterate asshole and a bunch of other Spanish idiots wiped them off the map. All we got left... Llamas! Drooling, stupid Llamas.

76 - Francisco Macías Nguema: Africa's Hitler that HATED smarty boys!

April 25th, 2019  |  1 hr 26 mins

60s, 70s, africa, african history, brain drain, cannibalism, colonialism, comedy, crazy, cult, cult of personality, dictator, drinking, drugs, equatorial guinea, execution, genocide, history, ignorance, intellectual, mass murder, murder, podcast, populism, psychedelic, spain, villain, witch doctor

Do you hate four-eye'd, know-it-all smarty boys that, like you know, love to learn and read books? Then, congratulations! You're as much of an ignorant dumbass as Francisco Macías Nguema a.k.a. Africa's Hitler.

75 - Benjamin Franklin (1776-1790): Franklin's War against Crown, Country & Family

April 18th, 2019  |  1 hr 11 mins

1776, america, american revolution, ben franklin, colonial america, comedy, death, diplomacy, drinking, england, espionage, founding fathers, france, history, murder, paris, podcast, scandal, sex, spy, war, war for independence

The second and final episode on America's founding father Benjamin Franklin. The once dutiful royalist turns patriot, leaving a wake of propaganda, broken families and even the country he helped build.

74 - Benjamin Franklin (1706-1776): Royal F-ckboy, Tabloid Journalist & Half-assed Inventor

April 11th, 2019  |  1 hr 40 mins

1776, 18th century, affair, america, american history, american revolution, ben franklin, brexit, britain, business, colonialism, colony, comedy, currency, drinking, entrepreneur, fake news, founding father, history, inventor, legend, london, loyalist, money, myth, newspapers, noble, orgy, parliament, patriot, philadelphia, podcast, politics, propaganda, revolution, royals, satanism, scandal, sex, success, tabloid, war

We all know Ben Franklin as an American Patriot, but was he really?! In this episode, we're exploring the man before the Declaration of Independence. What we find is a self-serving, vain, adulterous royalist that was far from the Patriot portrayed on the 100 dollar bill... Plus we talk about his dick... yes there are drawing of it...

73 - Charles Domery: The Grotesque Human Dumpster

April 4th, 2019  |  1 hr 25 mins

18th century, abnormal, army, battle, cannibal, cats, comedy, competitive eating, disorder, drinking, eating, england, france, gluttony, history, human dumpster, hungry, navy, podcast, poland, prussia, strange, war

Asterios Kokkinos joins in on the roast of Charles Domery; serial eater, cat hunter, turncoat and all around human dumpster.

72 - Kim Jong-il: Ass-eating Communist Dictator of North Korea

March 28th, 2019  |  1 hr 58 mins

asia, asian, basketball, comedy, communism, crazy, crimes against humanity, dictator, dmz, drinking, global politics, history, hostile, kidnapping, korea, mass murderer, movies, murder, north korea, oppression, pants suit, podcast, politics, south korea, totalitarian, war

When chubby little Kim Jong-il wasn't watching kaiju or Looney Tunes he was reinvented the rules of basketball, eating ass and starving his brainwashed people. Kim This pseudo-communist egomaniac that did absolutely nothing North Korea. Kim Jong-Un, if you or your spy network are listening, your dad sucked hard!

71 - William Shakespeare: To Cream or Not to Cream!

March 21st, 2019  |  1 hr 6 mins

16th century, acting, adultery, bisexual, books, cheating, classics, comedy, conspiracy, cover up, drama, drinking, england, english language, history, julius caesar, literature, london, macbeth, masterpiece, murder, painting, piercings, plays, podcast, poetry, romeo & juliet, school, sex, shakespeare, teacher, the stage, theater, uk

Was William Shakespeare an imposter? Maybe! We do know this Master of the English Language believed 'Anyth holeth is thyne goal' and he definitely got his ears pierced at Claire's.