Roast Mortem Cast

114 - Leopold II of Belgium: Crimes Against The Congo & Condangs

January 23rd, 2020  |  2 hrs 3 mins

belgian, belgium, comedy, crimes against humanity, genocide, history, monarch, podcast, rubber, waffles

Which tyrant of history caused the first ever Roast Mortem mid-roll, “bad vibes” break? Leopold II of Belgium!

He brutally and systematically culled the population of the Congo in the early 20th century. But don't worry, this episode isnt all doom and gloom, this smooth brained monarch didn't know which hole to shove his Belgian waffle PP into.

113 - Jakob Fugger: History's Richest Idiot

January 16th, 2020  |  1 hr 55 mins

16th century, accounting, amazon, bezos, business, comedy, commerce, germany, global trade, history, loans, podcast, royalty, scam, trade, warfare, wealth

Want to get rich quick? Like 4 times richer than Jeff Bezos? Listen to how this 16th century german scheiße pretzel became history's richest man by scamming the the inbred Hapsburgs, a few popes and millions of german peasants. Oh and he started a beef with the hemorrhoid-scratcher Martin Luther.

112 - Rob Ford: Toronto's Rotund Crackhead Mayor

January 9th, 2020  |  1 hr 39 mins

canada, comedy, crack, crackhead, drugs, drunk, history, mayor, ontario, party, podcast, politics, rob ford, toronto

Rob Ford and his family, or the Canadian Kennedys, partied their way to the top. This train wreck of a lineage blew, guzzled, injected and smoked their way into the national spotlight all while dominating Ontario politics. Rob's partying and the rise of camera phones gave the world a wonderful glimpse into his crack-fueled late nights with the Canadian chapter of the Bloods.

111 - George Psalmanazar: Phony Asian with a Fantastic Imagination

January 2nd, 2020  |  1 hr 56 mins

asian, charlatan, comedy, con artist, formosa, history, linguistics, podcast

This French charlatan went around Europe claiming he was an asian man from the mystical land of Formosa. He went to such lengths to protect lie that he created an entire language, history, culture, even maps of his made-up land.

110 - Theodosius I: The Roman Emperor that Started the Dark Ages

December 26th, 2019  |  1 hr 48 mins

catholic, comedy, constantinople, dark ages, emperor, fall of rome, goths, history, orgies, podcast, religion, religious war, roman empire, rome

Roman was one big party; orgies, wine, festivals and bad ass gods. Theodosius was having none of it! This roman emperor made Catholicism the state religion and plunged Europe into the Dark Ages. Party Poo Poo doodie head.

Roast Mortem 2019 Countdown Special

December 19th, 2019  |  2 hrs 44 mins

comedy, countdown, dead people, history, holiday, nye, podcast, special

It's that time of the year again, The 2019 Roast Mortem Cast countdown. We are going through the ages digging up idiots that died on the 19th year of their century.

109 - Giovanni Belzoni: Tomb Raiding Strongman Waterboy

December 12th, 2019  |  1 hr 57 mins

adventure, ancient aliens, archaeology, artifacts, carnival, circus, comedy, discoveries, egypt, egyptology, freak, history, mummy, podcast, pyramids, strongman, treasure hunter

Through a series of random events, this 6'6 Italian strongman found himself history's first Egyptologist. Belzoni looted his way through pyramids and ancient tombs, mashing mummies and destroying priceless artifacts, creating an infamous legacy for envious archaeologists that followed in his massive footsteps.

108 - Dr. Seuss: Manchild Author for Children

December 5th, 2019  |  2 hrs 11 mins

adulterer, aspergers, author, childrens books, dr. seuss, functioning alcoholic, illustrator, suicide

Dick Masterson joins us as we roast infamous man-child, Dr Seuss. Dr Seuss was an alcoholic, adulterer who couldn't get his whimsical imagination or impulsive urges under control. When he wasn't playing the role of a screwy taxidermist, he stressed out one of his "handlers" to the point of suicide.

107 - Aretha Franklin: The Soul Diva surrounded by Butthole Weenies

November 28th, 2019  |  1 hr 33 mins

african american, civil rights, comedy, diva, history, music, pedophilia, podcast, pop music, r&b, religion, singer, soul, strong women

While she was a diva, Aretha was not a complete asshole. BUT the people surrounding her life, such as her pedophile bible-thumping father and abusive stamp-collecting husband, sucked a big one. Join us as we take a dive into Detroit's own Queen of Soul.

106 - Roy Cohn: The Ultimate 20th Century Lawyer Scumbag

November 21st, 2019  |  2 hrs 3 mins

attorney, comedy, communism, con artist, conservative, corruption, history, homosexuality, hypocrite, lavender scare, law, lawyer, nixon, podcast, reagan, red scare, rosenburg trial, trump, tuna

This homosexual attorney was responsible for almost everything terrible and corrupt that happened in the 20th Century. Roy had his fingers in the elections of Nixon, Reagan and was the role model and personal fixer to Donald Trump in the 80's. He was also responsible for ruining the lives of countless fellow gays by exposing them in a time where homosexuality meant losing your government job. He did this all while sucking down cans of tuna fish and waterskiing in the polluted waters of the Hudson.

105 - Basil Zaharoff: WWI Merchant of Death with an Acorn Penis

November 14th, 2019  |  1 hr 54 mins

arms dealer, comedy, guns, history, machine gun, podcast, scam artist, warfare, wwi

Basil Zarahoff dealt the the world's most powerful killing machine, the Maxim Gun, to most of the world's superpowers right before WWI; all while posing as royalty to nut in as many aristocratic ladies he could!

104 - Gaston B. Means: 100% Shyster with a Dash of Geriatric Murder

November 7th, 2019  |  1 hr 47 mins

comedy, con man, conspiracy, detective, fraud, history, murder, podcast, private eye, thief

Gaston B. Means, besides having a hilarious name, was an oaf. This lumbering jackass actually testified against himself in court. How do you do that? By robbing, cheating and stealing anything he could get his hands on under the guise of being a 'Private Eye'. Also known a dick!!!

103 - Master Series: Child Stars 'Alfalfa and the Gang'

October 31st, 2019  |  2 hrs 8 mins

actors, brats, child stars, comedy, corruption, diff'rent strokes, drug abuse, drugs, fame, history, hollywood, little rascals, murder, podcast, porn, sadism, scandal

We're not roasting one but three child star divas! Sadistic Alfalfa got joy from hurting fellow Little Rascals. Diff'rent Strokes, Dana Plato went from America's sweetheart to a drug-riddled pornstar. And Hollywood's Brad Renfro made it big and burned out quick.

Did Hollywood corrupt these little shitheads or were they just idiots with a spotlight?

102 - Frank Sinatra (pt2): Ain't That a Kick in the Dick.

October 24th, 2019  |  2 hrs 14 mins

abuse, big band, comedy, crooner, divorce, frank sinatra, history, hollywood, italian american, las vegas, mafia, music, music history, music legend, organized crime, podcast, scandal, spaghetti

The Great Swoonatra saga continues! Frank's flopping his Italian sausage all over Hollywood and Las Vegas, blundering his way through life like a giant man child. But when his life becomes intertwined with the Vega's mob things get surprisingly violent and dark. See how this meatball meets his end!

101 - Frank Sinatra (pt1): The Lady is a Tramp... Let me get in it tho!

October 17th, 2019  |  1 hr 41 mins

big band, brat, comedy, crooner, frank sinatra, history, italian mafia, mob, music, music legends, new jersey, new york, nightmare, podcast, rat pack, singers, spoiled, swooning

Swooning and crooning didn't come easy for Frank Sinatra, in fact he had the voice of a hoary marmot in heat and the temper of a spoiled baby meatball. While his mother was off performing basement abortions, Frankie was off slipping it in whatever he could get his fat marinara fingers on.

100 - Alfred Latell: Travis' OG Furry Great-Grandfather!

October 10th, 2019  |  1 hr 33 mins

100th, acting, ancestry, animal, animal impersonator, anniversary, comedy, furry, fursona, history, podcast, sexual deviant, stage, vaudeville

Alfred Latell, Travis' great-grandfather, was the original Furry! His red rocket toured the world performing for royalty and superstars. But all good things come to an end and Al's vaudeville act came crashing down as Hollywood took over